Saturday, June 13, 2009

Liar Liar Pants on Fire. Who do you Lie to?

Tell me please, what kind of person is honest, loving and faithful to all friends, family and overall most anyone that is in their lives, yet lies to themselves? Now that makes NO sense! Nada. None whatsoever! If you ARE going to lie, you would think it would be to someone that doesn't know you are lying! This is what I am talking about.....

Every day and I mean every day I tell myself, tomorrow, yep tomorrow I am going to stop this food fest of eating all my favorite comfort foods (believe me there are lots and lots of them) , no exercising, sloth like rut that I have gotten myself into. Yep, TOMORROW! So, today since it is my last day, I better eat .........and drink.......and not go for a workout or run, no worries because tomorrow I am going to at least go for a walk! Now I know full well as I am telling this shitty lie to myself, tomorrow is NOT the day! Who does that? I could be lying to any number of people in my life, my boss, my kid, or even my mother, but nope I must be an idiot, because I choose to lie to myself. I do it, I know it and I still believe the lies!

Last night as look back, it was as if I was having an outer body experience. There I was drinking the third glass of red wine, shoveling in my third helping of mashed potatoes with butter (no gravy, I was cutting calories) and the giant helping of store bought roasted turkey breast loaded up with chemicals. Justified every sip, bite and swallow, because it was all about, that's right, tomorrow!
I am like goddamn Annie, Tomorrow, tomorrow there's always tomorrow, you get the idea....

The power of procrastination is not a good thing here, although I am good at it. I have managed to lie my way from a size 8 to a size 12, okay maybe sometimes 14. That's what I am talking about. Honestly, last year I was sporting a size 6. I tell myself, from an 8 to 10/12 that's okay, but I'm not just talking to myself, I am talking to you too. And now that I am being honest when I say it is not about the size, it IS about how I feel. Me being in my body at this weight. I just cannot get comfortable with the extra roll that resides right smack under my breasts and above my lap, even when I sit up straight. If you've ever had one, you know what I am talking about.

So as I write these words, tomorrow is no longer on the plate, it is TODAY! Really I swear to God it is today! Today I am going to the Farmers Market to get some fresh veggies, the grocery store and yes, today is the day I will at least go for a walk. Now if there is no post tomorrow, you'll know I got sucked back in.....

NOTE TO SELF: It's today not tomorrow!

3 comments:

  1. Dude. I'm right there with ya. But, I'm on day 4 of cutting sugar and my energy is up tenfold!

    Now if I can figure out a recipe for sugarless, carbless s'mores for the camping trip.

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  2. I am trying to locate a sugar free, calorie free, 2005 Zin or Cab!

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  3. Ha! I actually tried a web search to locate sugar free alcohol.

    It doesn't exist. I guess we're just gonna have to be high on life. bummer.

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