Back From the Great Outdoors

I have returned from our camping trip in the Sierra Mountains. It was a fabulous trip! Thanks to Dalio and Riki for posting while I was out.

So on my last post dated July 6th, I was down another 1.4 pounds and my goal was to have a breakeven number on my next weigh in. Ha. Ha. Ha! Yeah, I must have been suffering from some pre vacation loss of all reality. Did I really think I was going to adventure into the great outdoors and not imbibe and partake like someone that was lost in the desert for a week or so? I was not only thirsty and starving, I was delusional.

Everything, I mean everything tastes better outdoors! Here is just a sample of some of the food I was enjoying. Beer, wine, wine, beer, cheese, cheese with crackers, cheese with tomatoes and basil, cheese with more cheese, cheese with salami, crackers with cream cheese topped with sweet heat habanero jams, steak, pasta with bolognaise sauce, pancakes. But thank god I did not eat any white bread or smores because I was taking it easy on the empty carbs. It was a food feast and I loved every moment of it!

In my defense, I did do some wonderful hiking on the Pacific Crest Trail. I attempted to do a run, however the altitude combined with the heat kicked my butt. Not the alcohol or food, just the altitude and heat! (More delusions).

I would get brave and just hop on my scale. However during my last ‘self make-over’; the one that I decided I would simply accept my ever so present muffin top that resides in quantity over every pair of pants I own. You know, that roll of squishy fat that hangs over the top of your pants. It is similar in appearance to a muffin top hanging over the container it was baked in, but not nearly as appetizing and yummy. So I simply tossed the damn scale out. Yes indeed, I was just going to learn to accept my body and improve self image by not being focused on the number on the scale. How’d that work out for me? I was up two sizes, my muffin top/waist line expanded by more than just a few inches AND I am in need of a new scale!

Although, after serious consideration I think I’ll pass on the new scale purchase. This will help keep me aware of what I eat and how much I exercise this week. Who knows maybe it will take a miracle to reach the goal of breaking even this week. Or maybe, just maybe the exercise helped and I can pull this one off. Friday will tell……

NOTE TO SELF: Believe in miracles!

Is your Sense of Humor Intact?

I want to thank everyone for the fantastic feedback on my first few entries. I hope you know this is just intended to be fun and look for the humor in all the situations life puts before us. If I loose my sense of humor (as peculiar and obscure as it may be) it will be the end of me. Honestly, I can find something funny in everything, especially myself! I do crack myself up and frequently am amazed by the actions and choices I make in my own life. Some logical, some emotional, some with no rhyme or reason.

One of the things that stood out in your comments is how you could relate to my situation(s). Or how happy you were to know someone else has the same issues, quirks or habits. Isn’t that the truth? We all want to know that we are not weird or unusual. Which is a bit ironic since most of us strive to be unique individuals. Yet we only want to share the good stuff, the stuff that people go “Wow” isn’t that wonderful? No one wants to air the dirty laundry as funny as it truly can be. Nobody wants to share their odd little habits, failures or struggles, it makes them “look bad”. OOOHHHH - What will people think? Think Smink is what I say. Have fun with life!

I am here to tell you. I am letting my guard down and I will share all of me, with whomever the hell is willing to read this blog. It will be fun. It will be funny. And, there is a very strong chance you will feel a whole lot better about yourself as you read through my adventures and my challenges. So stick around, I am on a mission and it’s not impossible (okay, that was not funny, I know but I had to do it).

Until tomorrow............

NOTE TO SELF: The humor is there. If you can’t find it, look harder!

Dancing Queen - Is Your Body Language Speaking Your Language?

Yes indeed I made it to the gym today. I had a respectable one hour workout. First one in four weeks , wow did it feel good! It amazes me that I do love to workout. I love the benefits of exercise. However getting me to that gym is like pulling teeth without Novocain. Anyway the point of this posting is; does your body language speak your language?

There I was peddling away on the stationery bike with my IPod blasting in my ears. Diligently burning calories, rocking out, I could hear nothing but the music, ah but I could see so much perched upon my stationary bike. The single guy on the weights was eyeing the young girl on the treadmill. The chatter man (that’s another entire posting) was only out of breath because he would not stop talking whilst on the treadmill. The woman on the elliptical machine reading her novel, who probably would have burned more calories laying on her couch. The very, very bored front desk attendant that was daydreaming and wondering if the free gym membership was worth giving up a Sunday afternoon. The muscle man with the solid hot body lifting the weights, drenched in sweat. The young couple working out together, she is pregnant and they were so loving with each other. All the different body language was fascinating to me. There was so much conversation with so few words, (except for chatter man).

As I got deeper in thought, I started thinking about how often my actions and or words are misread, misinterpreted and misunderstood. Many times completely different than what I intended. But let me tell you, right here and now, my body language IS right on! As you may have read on the About Me section on this blog, I write: I am on a mission to have some fun, relax a bit and let my guard down. So in pursuant of my mission, once a month I have been going out dancing. Our last girls night out was a few weeks ago. Now, I am not a comfortable dancer, in fact I bet the word awkward would be accurate. Yes, I am an awkward dancer. I have never learned how to dance, so I just go out on the floor, look at every one else and mimic what they are doing. Needless to say if there are a bunch of different moves going on out there, I am trying to imitate each and every one. I don’t know which move is the most current or coolest one, so I try them all, generally all moves in the same song. I cannot describe what I look like, although I imagine it is similar to someone with a broken left foot, burning hemorrhoids and a dislocated right shoulder. This last outing gives me a better idea…..

Please keep in mind my self image is a bit damaged these days. That night as I was getting dressed I was really struggling with choosing something to wear. Everything I tried on was too tight, too short, wrong color, you get the idea. And nothing was comfortable. You know how snazzy you feel when you are sporting an outfit that makes you feel like you are a superstar; you walk around like you are Heidi Klum! Well, I was feeling the opposite that night. But in line with my mission I wiggled into something and off I went. We go to the local casino to listen to this great local band. They are a five piece band encompassing many genres of music including rock, jazz, oldies, country, and swing. Really they do provide the best in dance music. Especially perfect for folks in the “new 30’s to new 40’s age range”.

So I am out there dancing and the person I am dancing with asks “are you okay?”. “Yes, I'm fine" I reply. I really did not think much of it. A few songs later I was out dancing again. Same thing, the partner I am dancing with leans over and asks “are you okay?” I reply, “What?” He repeats the question. I reply “Oh, oh, Yes, I'm fine”. Okay, now that’s just weird. Then I am dancing with this guy, he is so much fun to dance with. From what I understand he had an accident that has caused some brain damage, however, he loves to go out and dance. Let me tell you, this guy is such a nice guy and boy does he have some moves. No inhibitions, no worries, he just gets out there and grooves with the music. Everything goes! So I am out there dancing away, not feeling quite so awkward because this guy is cutting loose. I mean he is footloose and fancy free on the floor. I’m out there dancing away with him, smiling and genuinely enjoying myself. Really feeling comfortable. Then, he leans over to me and says… “Are you okay?” What the what? Jesus, I must be as transparent as cellophane. Did everyone in this damn casino know how uncomfortable I felt in my own skin? It was if I was having one of those bad dreams where it is the first day of school and you forgot to put your clothes on! I just started laughing and replied “yes, I am just fine, thank you for asking, are you okay?”

I am still laughing about it. I even asked my friend the next day, if I was dancing really weird. She said not, but perhaps she was just being kind. Either way, that’s okay because I am sticking to my mission and having fun letting my guard down.

I guess the moral of this story is to get some dancing lessons if I don’t want people to worry about me on the dance floor. I got a good laugh and apparently so did the rest of the folks in the bar.

NOTE TO SELF: You can be uncomfortable and still have fun!